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the renegade bride

the wild, wacky adventures of a bridal industry insider +newlywed + new homeowner and (in practice)renovation-maven. Whee!

All these stupid teeth-whitening commercials make me feel like my teeth are inadequate and yellow.  As a result, I started researching possible means by which to whiten my teeth. As I cannot afford “Zoom” Whitening, here’s my options:

1. Whitestrips. Do they work? Are they worth the investment? Can I just buy the kroger brand (these are all questions I expect you to answer, of course)

2. Paint teeth with white-out the morning of the wedding (they WILL be pearly then, right?!)

3. Wear fake teeth set for wedding photos. I see these in movies all the time, so I could totally rock some fake teeth. Maybe I could get all twilight-y and wear some fangs.

4. Paint over teeth with gold paint or write on them “I love you Don!” on the uppers and lowers so that it’s covering up the yellowishness with a sweet and thoughtful message.

Sigh. I saw a groupon for $200 ZOOM whitening but honestly, peeps, our coffers are low. I found a knock off store brand of the whitestrips for $14.99– a vast price difference from Crest’s $45 asking price. Jerks. They know how important white teeth teeth are to me on my wedding day…

So, advice? Thoughts? Totally should do the white out thing, right? How classy!!!


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